Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions

This week, I found myself paying close attention to people and really listening to what they were saying.   I paid particular attention to the way parents speak to their own children.  I witnessed a parent standing in line at a store with a child that appeared to be about twelve years old.  The child was going to use his own money to buy a pack of gum and a candy bar.  He had $3.00 in his hand and was trying to figure out if he had enough money to buy both items.  Rather than letting him work out the math, the parent said, “Come one, you should know this, use your brain” in a less than pleasant tone of voice.  I watched the child look at his parent with hurt in his eyes and put the items back on the shelf.  The child’s shoulders dropped and he seemed almost defeated.  I found myself wanting to confront the parent about how our words hurt.  Instead, I simply looked away and felt sorry for the child.

Over dinner this week, I talked to my husband and daughter about microaggression and thinking twice before we speak.  I think it is very easy for parents to engage in interactions that are not always supportive of their child’s emotional well-being.  Later in the week, my husband was joking around with my daughter.  She began laughing and called him out on something he said by telling him, “I think that’s microaggression.”  I truly appreciate being able to translate my learning into action within my own home!

One thought that did occur to me this week is the importance of considering our body language and what it sometimes implies.  I think we communicate just as much, sometimes more, through our posture or facial expressions and it can be just as hurtful as what we say.